I had hoped to write a rather funny and eloquent first post about life with Cameron but alas, I am lacking in both the funny and eloquent departments at the moment. I’m lucky I even have a second to post!
Things have been hectic but going well.
Cameron and I had some nursing issues at first but I think we’re getting past them. He has a tight frenulum but the ped doesn’t want to clip because it’s not interfering with swallowing or weight gain. (Um doc, how about my nipples? It’s KILLING THEM!) I had purchased some reusable nursing pads but have since tossed them because they were sticking to my nipples and undoing any healing progress every time I nursed! (OUCH!) So until I get ahold of some nice comfy SOFT flannel nursing pads, I’m using Lansinoh disposables.
Alli and Charlotte are adjusting well. Yesterday was the worst day yet with both of them acting out but we muddled through. Charlotte’s got her back molars coming in right now so that’s lots of fun. Christmas however is a great time to add a little one to the family because the other children are blissfully distracted by all the new toys!
Now onto the important part – my emotions.
So far, so good. I am still on my med and doing well. I know it’s still early but already I am feeling so much different than I did after the birth of our two girls. The first day home alone, Cameron started crying during a diaper change and I actually laughed at him and told him it would be ok, mommy would be done in a second. Now, had that been two years ago, I would have started to freak out, anxiety would have kicked in and I would have rushed to finish and get him nursing. But instead I took my time, laughed, and everything was ok. I AM HAPPY! I could sit here with him in my arms and just get lost. We have had several moments like that actually – sheer blissful mommy and baby moments. And I have been grateful for all of them – I am not taking any of this for granted – no, I am drinking it in and loving every second of it. Of course part of me is wondering if this is too good to be true and if this happiness will last – but only a small part. I sincerely hope that small little part is wrong.