Monthly Archives: May 2012


Dear Pantone 19-4305 Pirate Black: You are not Alone

A few minutes ago, a member of #PPDChat shared this picture with me. You can find the original here.

I stared at it for a minute. Then I desperately wanted to reach out to the person who created this. To tell her that there’s no reason to continue to hide in the dark, in the black fog of Postpartum Depression.

I want to whisper to her that I am here, that she is not alone. To whisper that the claws of Postpartum Depression, yes, dipped in intense fear, are removable. There are those of us out here who understand what those claws feel like as they rip into our shoulders, our flesh, our hearts. As they shred our dreams and force us to create new ones from the ashes left behind.

Help is so close, and it will swirl around you just as the dark fog is swirling around you now. Except unlike the dark fog, the help lifts you up. It doesn’t drag you down or paralyze you in fear.

The help awaiting you buoys you up, above the fog, beyond the darkness. It’s out there, waiting for you to find it. Please, I urge you, take the first step and reach out. Further than this, email someone, talk to a professional, call Postpartum Support International. Find me on Twitter. Or email me.

You are not alone in the fear which has been your captor since July of 2011.  Make this year the year you find freedom.

Time - Are You Mom Enough

TIME Magazine fails to support mothers

When Jamie Grumet was tapped for an interview and photo-shoot for the most recent issue of TIME magazine, her goal was not to raise our hackles. Her goal, according to a Q&A at Time was: “There seems to be a war going on between conventional parenting and attachment parenting, and that’s what I want to avoid. I want everyone to be encouraging. We’re not on opposing teams. We all need to be encouraging to each other, and I don’t think we’re doing a very good job at that.” Read more:

I have to say —I kind of agree with Jamie— but I disagree with about where the judgment is originating. For instance, this weekend is Mother’s Day weekend. Instead of celebrating motherhood for the amazing and difficult job it is –regardless of your approach– TIME magazine instead chooses to share an incredibly divisive article with an even more divisive headline, “Are you MOM Enough.” The real title, as accessed at their website is: “The Man Who Remade Motherhood.”

As for the photographer, Martin Schoeller, who took the photo, in an article focusing on “Behind the Cover,” he stated: “I liked the idea of having the kids standing up to underline the point that this was an uncommon situation.” He also further stated, “It was important to show that there’s no stereotypical look for a mom who practices this kind of parenting.” Oh Martin. There’s no stereotypical Mom either – aside from, you know, a woman who has a child. Beyond that though, everything is up for grabs.

It’s time to stop judging each other for our choices. To stop allowing the media to get us all riled up. To stop thinking “Am I Mom Enough?” You are. No “as long as…” attached. There are, of course, mothers who don’t even try, mothers who have truly given up and are absent. But we’re not discussing mothers who are absent. We’re talking about mothers who give enough of a damn to raise their hackles in response to an article like this.

I don’t want to play the game anymore. But, as a mom who blogs and actively supports mothers who struggle with Postpartum Mood & Anxiety disorders, I feel I would be remiss in not addressing this topic.

Mothers, all of us, are different. We are unique in our approach to how we mother our children. These philosophies are rooted in how we are raised, how we relate to our partner, how our children relate to us, and the needs of our children. We adjust our lives in order to provide the best for our children with the resources we have and the beliefs which live deep within our hearts. If your children are secure, happy, and loved, there really isn’t any issue as to what your parenting philosophy is or if it’s any better than the mom next door.

All that matters is that what you’re doing WORKS FOR YOU.

This weekend, don’t wonder if you’re Mom enough.

KNOW you are. And know I love you for it.