Tag Archives: probation

Sweet Freedom

The first lesson I have learned this past year is never ever to take anything for granted. The second? To truly hand over the reins of life to God. As long as He is in control, doors will be opened.

I had no idea how much my life would change when my car glided so gracefully in the mist into another vehicle at 10:00pm on a dark March night.

But it did change. My husband’s addiction was exposed. Lies and dishonesty was brutally served up on a broken platter that had been gilded with gold but was now covered in dust and cobwebs. Once again I very easily could have found myself in the depths of despair, dirt beneath my fingernails, struggling with every shallow and panicked breath to reach the top for fresh air. Instead I swallowed deeply and exhaled, strengthening every fiber in my being to stand planted firmly in my faith and my belief that this beast would not knock me down as long as God’s compassion and support remained on my side.

The beast may have won some skirmishes but it did not win the battle. My resolve, along with God’s strength, are no match for whatever may come at us through life.

Today, this particular battle ended.

My retribution has been paid. My probation has ended. I am blissfully a free member of society and no longer under the shadow and ever attentive eyes of the criminal justice system. Man it feels good to be free. One of my college professors oft quoted that one truly cannot appreciate joy until one has experienced the burst of sour grapes upon the palate. What an applicable quote for today.

I am also reminded of a bible verse which instructs us to put things in the past behind us and move forward – remind us that this is true wisdom.

photo courtesy Pezlet of Flickr

photo courtesy Pezlet of Flickr

So this is me. Putting it behind me and not looking back. Much like a butterfly freeing itself from the cocoon in which it has miraculously undergone so many changes. It’s my turn to fly away.