Tag Archives: FEMA

AP News Alert – First Ever Indoor Hurricane strikes Home in Rural GA.

Rural GA, sometime last night – Odd Weather has struck again. This time, it struck inside a home. For the first time ever, an indoor hurricane is strongly suspected for the damage. Hurricane AlliChar is being blamed for a horrific trail of destruction.

The hurricane seemed to have started immediately outside the children’s bedroom, continued into the kitchen where it opened drawers, appliances, and even pulled items from packaging. The Hurricane then took a sharp left turn through the back door and appeared to have done the largest amount of damage in the bathroom, tossing magazines, toys, and other various sundries about.

Residents are in quite a state of shock but do plan to rebuild with a tremendous increase in property protection planned as a large part of their rebuilding efforts. An estimate of damage was not immediately available.

Funny thing is that I read at One Step Ahead’s website just yesterday day if your child is over 30in tall and 30 lbs, ditch the gate and be extra vigilant. Apparently “THEY” have NEVER met my kids.

I admit, I overslept this morning and did not get out of bed until shortly after eight. First mistake.

Second mistake – thinking the door alarm would be a deterrent. It was not. The beginning of the trail

In fact, we awoke to the biggest trail of toddler destruction we’ve ever seen. Someone alert FEMA. We need federal aid. I think there would have been less of a mess if a tornado or hurricane had ripped through.

Our two year old was in the floor blissfully shoveling Neopolitan Ice cream into her mouth with her hands. (Our four year old had gotten it out of the freezer by standing on a stool) Oh yeah, and most everything else that looked “cool and fun” was out of the freezer too – those long ice pops you can  buy in the huge box, fudge pops, italian ice bowls, yeah…. all in the floor. (I managed to recover the italian ice bowls – they hadn’t opened them yet – and the freezer pops, well, they’re impenatrable so they’re back in the freezer as well. The ice cream was an unfortunate victim as were the fudge pops.)

Our four year old was still digging through the freezer and had the refrigerator door open as well. The pantry door (which DOES have a latch on it) was open, a brand new box of cereal, a jug of juice, and the syrup had been removed. And the destruction continues

They had also gotten into the drawer container on the VERY top of a VERY TALL white shelf we have – removed one of the drawers, spilled grits everywhere and the rest of the packages – country gravy mix, roasted potato seasoning, onion ring coating, etc – were scattered about quite randomly.

A pink inkpad had also been wrought free from one of the drawers – they left a trail of little pink fingerprints all over the kitchen.

And no, I’m not even close to being finished.

It continues, Oh yes it does.

The trail led to the bathroom. They had gotten the hair clippers down (at least they didn’t figure out how to plug them in or we might have two very bald little girls right now)

There was poop on TOP of the toilet lid. Yes, on TOP. (and yes, I laughed when I saw this – I mean, seriously. On TOP???)

And it endsMagazines were strewn everywhere – my Nair strips were all over the place – again, imagine how funny THAT would have been! Two toddlers with Nair wax strips stuck to them… I’m giggling just thinking about the possibility!

Toilet paper had been intertwined with the mess – not much, just enough to make one frustrated. As if everything else hadn’t already gotten to us. Oh, and Chris’ tool box has been dragged in there as well. Thankfully we didn’t find anything IN the toilet as that has been known to happen.

Some sort of white powder – probably a gravy mix of some sort had been spilled in the bathroom right outside the shower. Chris commented about stepping out of the shower into the gravy mix and I retorted, “Well honey, that’s what you call INSTANT BREAKFAST!”

His response? “Yuck.”

The excuse we got for all of this mess? ?

“But Mommy, we just couldn’t be patient for breakfast anymore. We were hungry!”

(Nevermind the fact that we don’t usually EAT breakfast until about 830a every morning)

 

My final comment about all of this?

Thank GOD both Chris and I have the blessed ability to laugh at even the worst things. Because if we couldn’t – well, we both probably would have had several heart attacks by now.