Ahah! I think I’ve got this figured out..

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Woohooo!

Ok, so yes, Ms. Morning Sickness is here to stay. (AKA all day long and night sickness) BUT I think I have it figured out this time around. Thank goodness for Sprite Zero and a full belly. As long as I have a Sprite Zero to nurse and a full belly, I’m good to go. When I start to get queasy again, I know it’s time to munch again. I’m trying to keep fairly healthy food around to munch on – although I’m preferring mostly protein, today pretzels seemed to do the trick. Had a large steak dinner (YUM) and the mashed potatoes substited as my baked potato with tons of butter craving. Yeah, ok, so not exactly healthy but I ate light the rest of the day! LOL. Besides, when else can one pig out and have a legitmate reason for doing so? The BABY made me do it!!!! LOL!

I’m starting to do better with the fatigue too (darn, I was really loving that napping thing!) but hey, at least that means I’ll actually start getting stuff done during naptime again.

Today I finished Between a Rock and a Hard Place by Aron Ralston. And I have got to say that it was an absolutely amazing book. For those of you who are not familiar, Aron was the climber from a few years ago who got stuck in a canyon and was forced to break and amputate his own arm to escape. The book is superbly written and I would highly recommend it as an inspiring read. (Note though for you non-climbers- read the glossary before you start – I wish I had!) The part about the amputation is actually quite technically written as he was very methodical about everything he did during his ordeal. It’s truly amazing what the human body can survive when the spirit has the willpower.

I did take a nap after I finished reading though. Then the Babies Can’t Wait folks showed up and woke me up. GRRRRR. Charlotte barely qualified for an additional year of service due to language/speech delays. Although they did say that for everything she’s been through (cleft palate repair, g-tube, medically fragile for the first 5 months of life), she’s doing quite well. Besides speech, there’s really not much she can’t do. She’s still on the bottle but I think most parents have a hard time with that transition. It’s just a little harder on Charlotte because she can’t suck that well and most sippy cups require suction. We’re working on it though and have had the most success with the NUBY cups. She does better with the full size rather than the trainers though. The trainers leak entirely too much.

Gotta go – I’ve run out of Sprite Zero and I’m starting to feel a bit nauseous again.

A Mother’s Day Prayer for all of us…

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God our Creator, we pray:
for new mothers, coming to terms with new responsibility ;
for expectant mothers, wondering and waiting;
for those who are tired, stressed or depressed;
for those who struggle to balance the tasks of work and family;
for those who are unable to feed their children due to poverty;
for those whose children have physical, mental or emotional disabilities;
for those who have children they do not want;
for those who raise children on their own;
for those who have lost a child;
for those who care for the children of others;
for those whose children have left home;
and for those whose desire to be a mother has not been fulfilled.
Bless all mothers, that their love may be deep and tender,
and that they may lead their children to know and do what is good,
living not for themselves alone, but for God and for others.
Amen.

Toddlers are so funny..

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Our three year old, Alli, seems to have a grip on this whole baby thing. In fact, Thursday night while driving Charlotte and Alli over to Nana & Papa’s, Alli asked if we were going so I could show Nana and Papa where the baby was living. I replied that they already knew where the baby was living and I didn’t need to show them.

She’s constantly giving my belly hugs and kisses now and asking about the baby. Alli told me yesterday that it’s going to be a little girl because it has to be just like Charlotte. I hope she’s ok with the possibility of a little brother too because there’s a definite 50% chance either way…. ok, well, maybe not 50% because I can’t remember the genetic determining factors for gender at the moment and being that we already have two girls, I don’t know if that would make a difference or not. And frankly, I could care less what the gender is this time around. I almost want it to be a surprise but then again – what if it is a boy? Certainly he can’t wear the girl’s hand me downs! LOL! I think he’d be scarred for life and while parents inevitably end up doing that to their kids about one thing or another, my husband and I strive to do the least amount of damage in that department as possible.

 It hit me today that this will be the first Mother’s Day on which I will be pregnant. And the last. Kinda bittersweet all at the same time. I’m really starting to adjust to the idea of another child. While watching Charlotte and Alli play in the living room today, I realized that there was indeed something missing. It hit me that the “missing” was another child. I can’t wait to share that feeling with Chris because I know he will be excited to hear that I am getting excited about the pregnancy. Oh, and another first today too – my uterus is expanding – how do i know? I can feel it stretching. And lemme tell you – that is ONE WEIRD SENSATION. Almost as weird as the first time you feel an infant move inside you. Thank goodness I’ve never seen any of the Aliens flicks or my mind would really be going some weird places with that one.

I’m glad that I’m finally starting to feel at home with this pregnancy. And surprised that it hasn’t taken long. Surprised in a good way though. I feel very supported and loved and comforted by the network that I am surrounding myself with in preparation for this pregnancy. The only thing I am bummed about with this pregnancy at this point is that we had planned to go home to VA for Christmas. But with this baby due in January and Charlotte having popped out 3.5 weeks before her due date, I highly doubt that my OB will be terribly crazy about me traveling the two months before my due date. And that SUCKS. I haven’t been home for Christmas in a few years and if we don’t go this year, we probably won’t go until at least 2010 so we can be on the same schedule as my brother and his wife who live in Tennessee. I miss home sometimes. It’s nice being around his family but sometimes ya just miss your family! Guess we’ll see what I can talk my OB into…. but I am ready to accept the ban on traveling during the holiday season. In fact, I’m expecting it. (HAHHAHA….. no pun intended either!)

Gotta run. My tummy is growling and it’s time for Charlotte’s mid-day bottle as well.

Dose of Reality…

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Tuesday evening this week I held my first peer support group meeting of the month. About an hour and a half in, I was ready to pitch in the towel and go home because no one had shown up. Just then, our one regular drove up. I recognized her vehicle and was happy to see her because I really needed someone to talk to this week. Turned out she needed to talk too but that’s confidential and I can’t share it with you! (sorry!) I listened to her first, and finally decided to share my news. She was thrilled for me and asked if I was scared – not only because of the PPD but because of the potential for a repeat birth defect.

At first I said that I was doing ok, then I stated that it kind of scared me that I’m doing so well with it. She told me not to worry about being scared and to just take the OK part.

Not so sure that I am doing that. In the back of my mind, I’m freaking out a little bit more every day. But by the end of the day, I’m ok again. I feel like such a yo-yo. And I had totally forgotten just how much early pregnancy can mess with your physical well being. Ok, well, pregnancy messes with you in general, but early pregnancy is my least favourite. I am horrible at being exhausted and queasy. I just shut down. I discovered yesterday that as long as I keep my belly VERY full, I don’t get queasy. So I pretty much need to be grazing all day long. Which means I need to find healthy non-fat stuff to snack on because I am determined to not gain a lot of weight this pregnancy. It’d be nice if I could actually end up losing weight when all said is done. Granted I want to have a healthy pregnancy but at nearly 100lbs overweight in the first place, the last thing I need to be doing is adding another 25-35lbs! I handled the Gestational Diabetes diet with my first just fine and she was great so I am trying to slowly gear my diet in that direction.

 As far as counseling goes this pregnancy, the first thing I did the day after I got my positives was call my therapist and find out if we could move my appointment up. She saw me the next morning at 730a. I LOVE MY THERAPIST! My husband and I have a joint visit this Tuesday at 6pm. It’ll be interesting to see how that goes. He’s having some stress issues related to the financial aspect and his overall responsibility in that department. I’m hoping we can work through those together. Although he abhors being “shrinked.” Sometimes though – it’s necessary to deal with a tough life situation. And I would certainly call what we’re going through a tough life situation.

That’s all for now – just gotta face my biggest decision of the evening – do I REALLY want to give into my craving for fried chicken skin or not? (yeah, I know, and it IS my weirdest pregnancy craving to date!)

Warmest,

Lauren

Dear Ms. Morning Sickness….

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Well well well.

I was wondering when you’d arrive. I had started to think that maybe, just maybe you’d stay away this pregnancy and I wouldn’t have to languish away at home instead of going to a play date – or be able to happily spin my daughter around instead of telling her “Sorry honey, mommy’s already spinning!”

Welcome back Morning Sickness. And middle of the day sickness. And evening/bedtime sickness. So so sorry I didn’t hang up any Welcome Back signs or set out a buffet of ginger ale,saltines, and ice water. I am so screwed this time around. The first time, you blanched at the taste of spearmint gum. Now I can’t even look at the stuff. The second time, it was Dr. Pepper, oranges, and Will & Grace. Now, I can’t drink Dr. Pepper or watch Will & Grace re-runs. Oh and those preggy pop things? Apparently you’re immune to those when it comes to me. And just how did you GET the name morning sickness to begin with??? WHAT A MISNOMER!

 I just have one favor this time – please please don’t overstay your welcome again. 6 months the first time was way too long. I sincerely appreciated the 4 month stay the second time but did you have to be so active and raucous? Did you really? Was that REALLLLLY necessary? Maybe just the standard First trimester this time. That would be nice. Then I wouldn’t have to laugh at the doctors and experts who stand there and tell pregnant women all over the world that you magically walk out the front door at three months on the dot. Or maybe you could just stay a week and hang out quietly in a corner or something. Just don’t rock the boat so much this time and we’ll get along just fine.

Yours Truly,

 One queasy pregnant Mama