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Tag Archives: compassion
Sometimes God whispers at just the right time
This morning I arose to a husband who hadn’t been to sleep because of his back pain, a screaming hungry baby, and two toddler girls who were extremely excited about going to church.
I didn’t want to go.
But they were beyond excited. Allison had told Charlotte that today was Sunday and that meant they got to go to Sunday School!
Chris certainly wasn’t going as he hadn’t been to sleep yet. The in-laws were out of town so we couldn’t ask them to pick up the girls. If we stayed home, the morning promised to be a difficult one.
So I went even though I didn’t want to go. I fixed breakfast, the girls and I ate, got the girls ready, got myself ready, and out the door we went. I arrived early and sat down next to some family friends and ended up talking with her about PPD. She shared with me about her experience and would you believe that 25 years ago, she had an AWESOME doctor who was caring and knowledgeable? I told her she was SO lucky to have that doctor in her life at that time. What a blessing!
Church Service started and after a few rounds of cleansing song, a soldier fresh from his 3rd tour of Iraq approached the stage to present the church with an American flag that had flown high in Iraq on his tour. There was not a dry eye in the house as we all stood to recognize his amazing service to our country. Agree with the war or not, there is no wavering in the military’s dedication to what this country stands for and I commend them all for their service.
The pastor began to preach and as he spoke, I found myself distracted, something that doesn’t really happen a lot to me at church because our pastor is awesome, as he was today. I flipped to the back of my bible and began to look for the word “depression” in the concordance and term glossary. I found it and began to read the bible verses quoted there. Once I was done, I returned my attention to the sermon, which focused on 1 John, chapters 1 and 2. Walking in the light with Jesus and focusing on the truth of the Word, and accepting forgiveness that Jesus so amazingly gave to us.
As the invitation was given, I felt an overwhelming urge to look towards the front. I saw a man who had gone forward and after the invitational song was over, our pastor shared with us what this man had shared. He had been struggling with Depression and wanted the Church to pray for him. We were led in closing prayer and dismissed.
Instead of leaving, I went against the crowd to the front of the Church. I knew God was guiding me forward. At the front of the church, I sat down, noticing an older woman in the second row just crying her heart out. I went over and asked her if she was his wife, she said she was. Telling her about my bout with depression (briefly) and letting her know that I volunteer to help women with depression, I asked their names and wrote them down so I could pray for them as they faced this together. I also wrote down all of my information and gave it to her with the instruction for her to call me or email anytime she needed to talk. I then sat with her until the men of the church were done praying for her husband, letting her know that she didn’t need to talk to me, that we could just sit there together quietly. I also spoke with her husband and let him know the same thing – and will be sending a book to the Church for him tomorrow. It’s a book that Tara Mock over at Out of the Valley recommended to me – New Light on Depression by David B. Biebel D. Min. & Harold G. Koenig, MD. It is not only medically valuable, but biblically valuable as well.
I don’t ask much of you, dear readers, but if you would lift this family in prayer, I know they would appreciate it greatly. I would appreciate it greatly.
Even when God whispers, I hear him. For this I stand amazed. It has been a long time and I have missed hearing His voice guide my actions.
Grace Award
Darren Bernhardt, of TheStarPhoenix.com is honored for his story, “Child care necessary for support groups,” in which he reports on the loss of child care for a Saskatoon (CA) Postpartum Support Group. Darren’s writing dignifies and honors the journey these moms take as they struggle to overcome such a difficult times in their lives.Thank you Darren, for respecting these families and the program that supports them during this time.
New Feature: The Grace Awards for Journalists
After having read that horrid story in the Orange County paper in which the journalist failed to do his homework and mistakenly gave the impression that “Baby Blues” and Postpartum Psychosis are the same thing, my mind has been working to come up with a way to recognize the journalists that DO their homework and indeed pay postpartum depression tragedies with the respect and compassion that they deserve.
I finally came up with the term and graphic to go with it. The badge is simple but my hope is that it will be “worn” with honor by journalists who have shown their true integrity, compassion, and knowledge when they report on any story related to postpartum mood disorders.
If you come across any journalists (or if you are one) who have reported on a PMD story and done so in the manner set forth above, please submit the story and journalist’s name for consideration to sharing.the.ppd.journey (at) gmail.com with GRACE AWARDS as the Subject line.
The first journalist I would like to honor is Anna Velasco for her story, “Shining A Light after Tragedy,” written regarding the Jenny’s Light Foundation I posted about yesterday. Ms. Velasco showed a tremendous amount of integrity, compassion, and knowledge in her writing of the story as well as highlighted her talent for focusing on the positive in light of such a tragedy. Thank You, Ms. Velasco. Wear your badge with honor!
Absolutely OUTRAGED
UGH!
As if it’s not enough that we already face enough during PPD, the stigma, the refusal of acknowledgement, the confusion over baby blues, postpartum depression, other mood disorders, and Postpartum Psychosis – then along comes an article like this one: Woman found insane in Baby Blues Case seeks Sanity Restoration with the subtitle specifying: Sheryl Massip was found not guilty by reason of insanity 20 years ago for killing her infant son while suffering from post-partum psychosis.
Cover your ears. Prepare your eyes. i’m about to yell. And I mean YELL.
THE BABY BLUES ARE NOT AT ALL SIMILAR TO
POSTPARTUM PSYCHOSIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Get your facts straight Mr. Welborn. (by the way, you can email him and call him (714 834-3784.) Let him know that he is seriously mistaken with his usage of terms.
Let’s revisit the facts, shall we?
According to an article by Helen Jones at the Postpartum Support International website, the baby blues affect up to 80% of new moms and involve crying for no reason or general stress or anxiety that dissipates after the first few weeks.
Within the same article, Jones defines Postpartum Psychosis as:
Postpartum Psychosis (PPP)
The onset is usually sudden, with symptoms including: delusions (strange beliefs) and/or hallucinations; feeling very irritated, hyperactive and unable to sleep; significant mood changes; and using poor judgment in making decisions. Women who are more vulnerable are individuals who have a previous history of psychiatric disorders, previous postpartum mood disorders, or a family history of psychiatric disorders. Women who display any of these symptoms should contact their health care provider immediately. Family members should be alert for these symptoms as well, since they are often able to recognize serious symptoms sooner than the mother does.
Do these even SOUND like they’re in the same ball park?
NO.
In fact, Baby Blues aren’t even classified as a mental health disorder.
Could referring to PPP as the baby blues scare a brand new mother who may be feeling a little weepy or be starting to become seriously depressed? HECK YEAH.
To make matters worse, Mr. Welborn also later refers to PPP as an extreme form of Postpartum Depression. Let me make one thing crystal clear. POSTPARTUM DEPRESSION IS NOT THE SAME THING AS POSTPARTUM PSYCHOSIS. It’s an entirely different creature consisting of a break with reality. From what I understand, Postpartum Depression cannot develop into Postpartum Psychosis. (I’m doing some checking into that and will get back with you regarding research on that point)
I am very disappointed in Mr. Welborn’s apparent lack of tact and compassion for new mothers struggling with this range of disorders. And even more disappointed that the newspaper he works for would publish this article without such a brazen irresponsibility and lack of concrete understanding into the condition on which they are reporting. VERY DISAPPOINTED. Did I mention I’m pissed too? Or have you already figured that out?
Those of you who either read this blog regularly or know me should recognize that I don’t do this very often but when I do, I mean it and I am truly, deeply saddnened that this is still happening. Media sensationalism of these cases is a barrier to treatment for women – I’ve had many women share with me that they or their husbands are fearful of admitting they have postpartum mood issues for fear that what happens to the women they read about in the paper may happen to them. UGH! I can’t personally guarantee that you won’t develop PPP but I CAN tell you that it is rare – extremely rare BUT these cases are the ones who make the news. Not the positive cases of recovery – no – the ones that end in sheer tragedy and will bring in viewers.
Email Mr. Welborn. Call him. Contact the OC Register’s Editorial Staff and Operating Management. Let them know we won’t stand for this. Let them know that if they’re going to cover a PPD story they need to get their facts straight and focus on the positive rather than the negative. BE SENSITIVE not only to the people in the story but the people who may be reading the story. They owe us that much.