I finally got around to completing a Facebook page for My Postpartum Voice at Facebook!
I hope to continue to improve on it as time goes by but right now it is a work in progress.
You won’t regret it.
I finally got around to completing a Facebook page for My Postpartum Voice at Facebook!
I hope to continue to improve on it as time goes by but right now it is a work in progress.
You won’t regret it.
Communication today is often done via email, text, twitter, facebook status updates. It’s become much less personal and much less formal. For some, this is good. For others, not so good. Some things get lost in translation. It’s easy to type something and hit send without thinking. It’s also easy to apply this short communication style to every day life, leading to quick judgments, misunderstandings, and worse, the planting of grudges and beginnings of the end of relationships. The art of the thoughtful conversation seems to be drifting by the wayside.
Many women and families with whom I’ve worked have expressed to me that the biggest challenge they face is enabling those around them to understand what is going on without increasing stigma or losing their formerly close relationships. It’s a struggle to go through a Postpartum Mood & Anxiety Disorder let alone try to explain the complexity of it to a loved one from whom you need support.
When I spoke with my parents about PPD, they were understanding, compassionate, and actually did their own informative research. The one thing that stood out to me when I was hospitalized came from a phone call with my dad. He said something simple yet profound (my dad is full of those – I LOVE him for it). My father told me not to let anyone tell me I was “crazy” for the way I was feeling given my situation. My situation was that two months prior I had given birth to our second daughter who was then subsequently diagnosed with a cleft palate and by then had undergone two surgeries, one major to help lengthen her jaw in order to allow her to breathe safely. I held it together as long as I could but finally collapsed on day 56. Turns out for me, falling apart was precisely what I needed in order to pull it back together.
I’ve spoken with Mothers and their Parents alike who are frustrated and upset by the lack of information, communication, and the subsequent misunderstandings that follow all too often in the wake of a Postpartum Mood & Anxiety Disorder. Often these very issues only serve to compound a family’s recovery.
Today, I would like to take the opportunity to check in and see how (or if) you told your parents (or in-laws) or kept up appearances with them. Did you let them see inside the dusty window or did you keep the shade pulled down and pray no one would accidentally flip it up?
Let’s get to Just Talkin’!
Today I’d like to focus on the real faces and true stories of Perinatal Mood Disorders.
These are the stories of everyday people who have ferociously fought to survive this insidious illness.
These are the people who realize the true value of The Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHER’S Act. They passionately support the legislation.
Many of them are also now ardently dedicated to supporting others as they tread on this dark and lonely path.
Got a few minutes?
C’mon in – grab a cup of tea and sit down.
Let me introduce you to a few of them.
Meet Heather. Her brush with Postpartum Depression began during the pregnancy of her first child. Anxiety and intrusive thoughts settled in, causing her to obsess about birth defects of her unborn infant. Things went from difficult to worse when Heather experienced a reaction to a pain medicine administered during labor. She awoke at 7 hours postpartum only to witness her son receiving oxygen. Once home, she stopped sleeping, going days without rest. Her milk supply dried up as a result of the intense stress she was experiencing. Heather and her family moved in with a family member as it was no longer safe for her to be on her own. With an intolerance to all medications (including antibiotics), she sought help via talk therapy and a kinesiologist. After a few months of therapy, she was given a clean bill of health. Heather now serves as a moderator at the Online PPD Support Page and finds helping others very rewarding and meaningful. You can read more of Heather’s story by clicking here.
Then there’s Helena Bradford, one of the most amazing women I have ever had the privilege of knowing. Her daughter Ruth Rhoden Craven tragically ended her life after struggling with Postpartum Depression. Doctors were unable to help and some bad internet advice led the family to believe all Ruth needed was a vacation. How wrong they were! Helena works each and every day with a determination to prevent what happened to Ruth from happening to others. She is deeply rooted in her faith and believes without a doubt that the Lord has used Ruth to further the cause of PPD awareness. Helena has an amazing will. She is standing strong despite her tragic loss. Read an interview with Helena by clicking here.
Another parent who has joined the battle is Bob Gibbs. Bob lost his daughter and grandson, Jennifer Gibbs Bankston and Graham Bankston on December 19, 2007. This particular story is very hard for me to write about. I gave birth to my son on December 18, 2007, just a day before Jenny and Graham lost their lives. Even in the face of this tragedy that would cause most to buckle and falter, Bob and family have instead garnered strength and power. They have turned their loss into a powerful outreach program which has garnered national recognition. Jennyslight.org is a powerful and energetic new force within the Postpartum Advocacy landscape, one we hope will continue for a very long time. While we are saddened for their loss, we are thankful for their dedication and passion to families struggling with Postpartum Mood Disorders. Get to know Bob Gibbs in his own words by clicking here.
Meet Cheryl Jazzar. She experienced a psychotic break after the birth of her first child and was subsequently hospitalized. The break destroyed her marriage and she lost her child as a result. Five years later found her remarried with another child on the way. She experienced a depression a few months after birth. Using self-care, she rebounded quickly and knew she had something to share. Cheryl began to educate herself regarding alternative and complementary methods of treatments available to mothers during the perinatal period. She quickly became quite knowledgeable regarding non-traditional methods of treatment with a strong desire to share this with other mothers. Cheryl is a passionately dedicated volunteer for PSI and also blogs at Wellpostpartum regarding alternative and compassionate care. You can read Chery’s interview here.
Now I’d like to provide a different point of view. A mom is not the only one affected by a Postpartum Mood Disorder. Her husband is also affected. Meet Dan Scott, a father who has stood by his wife as she struggled three times with a Postpartum Mood Disorder. Each time was a unique experience, one that tested their marriage and their faith. Dan states that the second time around was the worst – there are moments they don’t even remember because the circumstances were so dark. As a result of his journey, he finds himself more sensitive towards new mothers. He recognizes the hard times the birth of a child can bring. He advocates for new fathers to step up and take their vow of “for better or for worse” seriously. Dan believes he is a better man for having been through this with his wife. Want to read more about Dan’s story in his words? Click here.
Last but not least, I’d really like to introduce you to a mom named Jamie. She’s a mother to one daughter and is due to give birth in June. Is she scared of experiencing Postpartum Depression again? Absolutely. Has she had issues with mood already during pregnancy? Yeap. But she is bravely speaking up about her experience and is being very pro-active this time around. Her first episode found her not wanting to bond with her child. Instead of being the blissful new mom society tells we should be, Jamie cried, lashed out, and wanted to pack her bags to run away. She finally sought help after her father questioned her constant negativity. Jamie has one piece of advice for new moms. Get help – the sooner the better. Want to read more about Jamie’s story in her own words? Click here.
Now that you’ve had a chance to read some of the true stories of survival, I hope you’re picking up your phone and calling the H.E.L.P. Committee.(If the line is busy, call the next member but keep trying until you’ve spoken with every office!)
Have you emailed Susan Stone yet with permission to be added to a list of supporters? If not, email her with your name, state, and any credentials or organizational affiliations at susanstonelcsw@aol.com right now! (Seriously – you’re already on your computer, right? It takes five seconds!)
I hope you’re blogging to raise awareness and support for The Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHER’S Act. Got a twitter account? Raise your voice there too. Share this on Facebook! DIGG it! Don’t let these voices go to waste. Raise yours with them.
Remember in the children’s book, Horton Hears a Who, it wasn’t until the tiniest Who raised his voice that the jungle animals finally believed in the existence of the Whos. We need ALL of your voices. Now.
Are you excited?
I am!
Starting tonight at midnight, you’ll be able to get the low-down on all the details of this week’s blog campaign to show support for the Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHER’S Act.
(By the way, there’s an interview with Mary Jo Codey on the way too!)
There will be blogging, twittering, facebooking, myspacing, DIGGing, and whatever other form of social media you’re into.
There will be calling.
There will be sharing, paying it forward, and strength in numbers as those of us dedicated to supporting new moms in the perinatal period raise our voices in support of this important legislation.
Even if you don’t do blogging or social media, call the H.E.L.P. Committee members to let them know you support this legislation. There will be a call script provided at midnight as well. And if you’re in the mood, there will also be a suggested letter to the editor for you to send into your local papers.
Let’s make this one for the record books, folks!
Join me on Facebook next Friday for the following event!
Looking forward to seeing you there!
(Click on the snazzy graphic below to RSVP and get more info! Oh, and feel free to grab snazzy graphic and use to promote the event at your site too!)
The MOTHER’S Act has been through mark-up and will go to vote this month in the US House. Won’t you sign the petition in support of this valuable legislation?
On Friday, March 20th, we’re asking you to sign the petition as well as share this event on your profile, encouraging those you know to sign the petition!
***Note*** Even if you’ve already signed the petition, we encourage you to sign up to attend and ask that you share the event on your profile to encourage others to sign the petition as well! And we thank you for already signing! *****
If you’re curious about the full text of the legislation, it can be found here: http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h20/text
To read immediate Past President of PSI, Susan Dowd-Stone’s statement about this advocacy effort, click here: http://unexpectedblessing.wordpress.com/2009/03/09/sign-the-petition-in-support-of-the-melanie-blocker-stokes-mothers-act/
Thank you for your support and compassion for those who struggle daily with a Postpartum Mood Disorder!