Pssst. Have you heard? There’s a new diet in town and MAN is it sexay!
One part yellow kernel to one part cocoa bean.
I cain’t wait to get this one going!
I’m gonna eat Chocolate Popcorn for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and midnight snack. I may even adopt the Hobbit habit of Second Breakfast. And Elevensees.
Hell. Tea Time? All over it. Screw cucumber sandwiches. Gimme a giant ball of popcorn slathered in rich dark chocolate please.
Or if I want to be more ladylike, two pieces of popcorn with an M&M smooshed in between them. It’s practically a Ménage à trois of health!
I’ll be healthy and svelte in no time, right? Right?
I wonder if I can scrounge up a prescription for Ambien. You know, for mindless trips to the kitchen in the middle of the night. Or wait, is that Lunesta? I can’t remember. I’m too busy day dreaming about a pool full of puffy popcorn coated in a lusty sheen of chocolate. Mmmmmm.
Paula Deen’s got nothing on this new diet. Butter Schmutter, y’all.
Popcorn is packed with anti-oxidants. Just like chocolate. Which, you know, makes you thinner.
It’s a win-win situation, right?
Especially for Oral-B. Because you know, kernels.