Category Archives: blogger

In Support of Strong Start Day 2011 at Postpartum Progress

Postpartum Progress. Those two words inspire hope, community, compassion, and an inordinate amount of other gushing caring words in my head. So many in fact, it would take forever to list the ones in existence and even more time to explain the ones which don’t exist but would after I was through.

Katherine Stone is a staunch advocate for women with Postpartum Mood & Anxiety Disorders. She’s, quite frankly, one of my heroes. When I first struggled with Postpartum Depression back in 2004, I think I came across her blog. She was brand new then. I didn’t know how to use the website because well, I was brand new to the issue myself. I browsed, think I learned a couple of things, and then traveled along my way. I wish I had realized then what I know now about Katherine and her site. If I had, I’m sure my story would be changed. But I didn’t and I went on alone. Until much later when I rediscovered Katherine and really understood what she and her site stood for to women like me struggling with Postpartum Mood & Anxiety Disorders. In fact, along with Karen Kleiman’s call to “Reframe your pregnancy” in her book “What Am I Thinking: Having a Baby After Postpartum Depression,” Katherine’s blogging was what made me think “Hey, I can do that too!” So I did. Katherine has supported me every step of the way. She’s pushed me to stay with it when I wanted to throw in the towel. She’s shared with me, treated me as an equal, as someone who mattered. For that, I can never repay her. Katherine Stone means the world to me and to countless other women across the world. And yes, I mean WORLD. This gal’s got some serious reach.

She’s a voice for those who can’t speak up on their own. She’s fearless when it comes to calling the media on a misnomer or a tragedy. She’ll call out doctors too. Society. Anyone. She is a force to be reckoned with when it comes to tromping on Postpartum Mood Disorders. I wouldn’t want to get in her way. Ever.

After yesterday’s post, I find it so very fitting to be posting in support of Katherine’s Strong Start Day today. Go visit her place. Donate if you can. What she does is priceless. And she’s never been paid for her blog. It’s hard work to keep it up, trust me, I know. I also know the passion in her heart is strong and determined. If she can do what she’s done with nothing for 7 years, then imagine what she can do if she’s funded. There’s no limit to the potential. I can’t WAIT to see the changes headed for the world down the road!

SO please. I rarely ask you to donate to anything here at My Postpartum Voice. But today I am. Today I’m asking you to make a difference in the world by donating to Postpartum Progress so Mothers & Babies will have a legitimate chance at a Strong Start.

Go. Now. Be the change.

Postpartum Depression is not just tears

Postpartum Depression is not just tears.

It can be anger. It can be irritability, frustration, insomnia, obsessive compulsive, or anxiety.

Postpartum Mood Disorders can manifest in mothers in so many different ways.

Not only do we fight against the stigma of struggling with a mental illness and/or not being thrilled about our newfound motherhood, we also fight against the stigma of what a mom with Postpartum Mood Disorder must be like. So many moms don’t reach out for the help they so desperately need because they don’t “have the typical symptoms” of Postpartum Mood Disorder.

It’s not all tears.

I found a blog post which speaks to this precise issue. Written by a mother of three currently expecting her fourth, she bravely shares her experience and admits that she would never have classified herself as having Postpartum Depression because she “wasn’t sad, I didn’t cry, I took care of my children.  My house was clean, my responsibilities taken care of. I didn’t sleep a lot, or wallow in my own misery.”

Go read the entire post here. Leave her some love and let her know she’s not alone!

After hitting publish, another mama left her blog post about the VERY SAME topic in the comments. Rather than leave it hidden down there, I want to encourage you to read her post too. Entitled Postpartum Disorders, this mama, Sarah, over at Dandelion Roars writes a great piece about how Postpartum Mood Disorders were not all she thought they were supposed to be – she even states she had never heard of Postpartum Depression. Most importantly, she points out that there is a myriad of disorders between Postpartum Depression and Psychosis.

Go read Sarah’s post too.

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How can My Postpartum Voice better serve you?

When I changed the name of my blog to My Postpartum Voice, I promised it would be more for you.

There are some changes coming down the road for My Postpartum Voice. They will be slow and gradual but overall, aimed at improving the resourcefulness of this blog/website for Moms and Families in need.

One of the biggest projects I have planned will be an all new Resources page. Not only will it cover Postpartum Specific resources, it will also include resources provided by you for every day living.

If you add one or two or more things to this blog that would make life easier for you or for new and struggling Moms, what would it be?

What helped you the most when you were struggling? Do you have a book you would like to recommend to other moms?

Would you like to see more video? More interactive features? What does interactive mean to you?

Please help me better help and empower you by responding to these questions either in the comments or by emailing me at mypostpartumvoice(@)gmail(dot)com with Improvement Suggestions as the subject line.

I look forward to better serving you in 2011!!

Warmest,

Lauren

Whatever Wednesday: Questions from Twitter

I decided to take questions from Twitter today. Only the first 5 responses though so as not to overwhelm myself. In no particular order, here are the questions and their answers.

1) @ksluiter asked: I want to know about succesfully weening to get pregnant or staying on meds while pregnant.

Staying on meds while pregnant was a decision I struggled with when I became pregnant with our son. The pregnancy was not planned so I skipped over the whole “weaning to get pregnant” concern and skipped straight into the “should I stay on my meds while pregnant” arena. This is most definitely a decision which should be made with the help of a medical professional. There were a few things which helped me make my decision a little easier:

a) Moms on meds when pregnant and then go off their meds during pregnancy face a higher relapse rate for mental health issues (specifically Postpartum) after delivering.

b) Baby has already been exposed to medication for 4-6 weeks by the time you realize you are still pregnant (unless you weaned beforehand) Going off meds cold turkey will affect baby as well as you.

c) High levels of stress/depression cross the placenta as well and can inhibit fetal growth and spur premature delivery. Given that my 2nd daughter had indeed been born nearly 5 weeks early, I was not interested in going that route again.

Bottom line here: This decision is an intensely personal decision. Talk with your doctor. Research. Know what you are comfortable with doing.

Couple of great resources for this are: Pregnant on Prozac by Shoshana Bennett and also Otis Pregnancy (also has a Twitter presence: @OtisPregnancy) Check them out.

2) @invisibledaddy asked: what’s the closest experience you’ve had to ppd besides ppd itself, to help us get a sense?

Wow. I had to really think for this question. I think the closest experience I have had to PPD happened my junior year of college. Within 19 days between February and March, I lost both of my grandfathers. This left me with no grandparents. The subsequent grieving process I went through was extremely similar emotionally to how I felt during Postpartum Depression. My grief was a very physical grief and that’s where it differed from my Postpartum. It also differed in that I wailed. A lot. Quite often I would wail and scream myself to sleep. I struggled with anxiety attacks as well, something I did not experience during Postpartum. I also thrashed and hit. It took me a very long time to recover.

The most important difference here is that people expect you to grieve when you lose a close family member or friend. When you have Postpartum, there is an element of guilt and shame accompany the disorder with which you struggle. Why? Because you have a baby. You SHOULD be happy. Even those who experience the grief of miscarriage or losing an infant within the first months of life experience this as many around them will tell them awful things such as “Well, it was never a REAL baby” (miscarriage) or “He/she wasn’t here very long so the pain will fade quickly because you didn’t have a lot of time to bond.” Acerbic comments such as this are extremely unhelpful and only serve to expose the ignorance of those offering them. (FYI, for a great website about miscarriage and infant loss, I highly recommend the folks over at Grieve Out Loud.)

Another thing I experienced with Postpartum that not many associate with it was intense anger and increased irritability. Many associate crying as one of the major symptoms. While it is a symptom, it is not one that every mom will experience. Many moms instead become very overwhelmed and as a result, develop what I term “explosive” personalities, blowing up over the smallest perceived injustice or high expectation.

3) @MamaRobinJ asked: How about blogging about PPD. How much detail do you think people should offer? What’s too personal?

I have a few personal rules I stick to when blogging about PPD. The primary goal is to keep from endorsing specific medications as I feel that is a discussion best left between physician and patient and to keep from triggering others.

Sharing details is good to an extent. That said, if you have a piece you are posting to your blog that a new mom may visit, always ALWAYS warn at the very beginning of the piece that if someone is in a fragile state, they should probably skip the post and come back when they’re feeling a bit healthier. I’ve taken to posting music videos via YouTube at the beginning of posts I think may trigger someone. Katherine Stone, author over at Postpartum Progress, has a symbol she posts at the beginning of potentially triggering posts. We all have our own methods but we all keep in mind the fact that the people reading our blog may not be in the same mindframe we are now.

Another thing aspect of sharing details is that in writing your own story, you may feel drained. It may drag up some of the same emotions you had when you experienced while in the depths of PPD. Be prepared to deal with this. Sharing is therapeutic. But it can also be exhausting. Share at a pace which is healthy for you. Your mental health is far more important than indulging the curiosity of your readers.

Too personal for me is:

  • Naming the Psych Hospital I spent time in
  • Naming any of my Physicians
  • Naming any of my medications

Even with HIPAA, for me this is a privacy issue and one that I will not disclose under most circumstances.

If I do disclose my medication, I am very careful to say that it is what worked (or didn’t work) for me. All treatments/therapies work differently for different people. It is important for us to respect the journey of others toward wellness.

4) The good folks over at @bandbacktogether asked: “why did you start to blog?”

The best answer to this question is back at my very first post in May 2007. But, for the sake of posterity and saving you a click and a ton of reading (and the horrificness of my first ever blog post), my husband and I found ourselves quite unexpectedly pregnant after a very nasty episode of Postpartum OCD (and probably PTSD due to my daughter’s NICU stay). Once the pregnancy test lines turned pink and I dug myself out of bed after reading Karen Kleiman’s “What Am I Thinking: Having a Baby After Postpartum Depression,” I decided to start a blog in order to “reframe” my pregnancy as Karen suggested. Little did I know something I started for just for me would still be around nearly four years later and evolved into what it has today – including #PPDChat at Twitter every Monday at 1p & 830p ET.

5) @TouchstoneAZ asked: “Have you seen any correlation between when period returns pp even while bfing and PPD?

When I asked for further clarification, she stated she was asking about mood and period. If I’ve understood her question correctly, I think she’s asking about increased issues with mood during PMS after an episode of Postpartum. SO many mothers (including myself) struggle for a long time with increased mood issues during PMS after a Postpartum episode. I get increasingly irritable, cranky, and just all around grumpy. I was on medication for PMS prior to pregnancy for my PMS. In fact, I remember reading research stating that women with PMDD (or severe emotional issues during PMS) are at a slightly higher risk for developing PPD. I can’t find the link at the moment though as my kids are on day 3 home from school for snow and frankly, my brain is fried. I’m also defending my laptop from my three year old as I type this so .. when I find the link, I’ll update this answer with it, I promise.

 

This was fun! I may have to do this again next week! If you liked this feature and have a question about my experience or anything Postpartum related, please either @ me on Twitter (I’m @unxpctdblessing) or email it to me at mypostpartumvoice(@)gmail(dot)com with “Q&A submission” as the subject line. I look forward to hearing from you!

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Postpartum Voice of the Year Voting: Round I

Welcome to the first annual Postpartum Voice of the Year Awards!

Here at My Postpartum Voice, I believe strongly in encouraging and supporting other parents who decide to share their journeys through Postpartum Mood & Anxiety Disorders. Each week, on Thursdays, I would highlight a different post or submission from around the web as part of my Postpartum Voice of the Week series.

In order to be included in Postpartum Voice of the Year, your post or submission would need to be a Postpartum Voice of the Week. This year there are only 18 entries as the Postpartum Voice of the Week did not start until May.

Next year, I imagine there will be several more entries. Although in 2011, there will be a Postpartum Voice of the Month, as determined by you via voting. Only the Postpartum Voices of the Month will be eligible for Postpartum Voice of the Year in 2011.

This year, there will be voting in three rounds.

All entries are combined in groups of six according to chronological appearance as Postpartum Voice of the Week.

The top two posts will move on to a final round for a total of six finalists.

The finalist will receive bragging rights as Postpartum Voice of the Year, a spiffy badge for their blog, a dedicated blog button here at My Postpartum Voice linking to their blog, and a to-be-determined prize. (I’ll update on that as details are made!)

Beneath the poll below, you will find a list of the posts including a direct link to the post at the author’s blog. If the posts were submissions to My Postpartum Voice, the link will lead to their post here.

If you have been nominated and want to grab a Nominated badge, feel free to email me for it!

I urge you to read each post again before voting.

Happy voting!

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Based on a True Story Part I & Based on a True Story Part II by Pamela at 2 much Testosterone

10 questions for a Partner of a PPD Survivor: My Husband by Walker Karraa

Life as we knew it from Carrying Me Through

Label Me & Put me in a box (submission)

Please don’t take my Sunshine away (submission)

The “D” Word by Raising Little Women

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