Category Archives: advocate

Stigma

While writing the previous post regarding the sleep study, I remembered something.

When I was hospitalized, the one thing the nurses emphasized to me over and over and over again was that I didn’t have to tell anyone where I had been UNLESS I CHOSE TO DO SO. We even had a cover story for where I was that weekend as I was supposed to be co-hosting my sister-in-law’s baby shower. I was very ill and unable to attend. Everything was kept very quiet at the time and only immediate family knew what was really going on. My mother drove down from VA the night I was hospitalized so Chris could go to work and we would have someone to care for the kids (THANKS MOM!)

I don’t know why we kept it so quiet then. Fear? Shame? I wasn’t well enough to feel either of those things and honestly, I am obviously not ashamed of having been hospitalized because if I was I wouldn’t be doing what I’m doing right now.

As far as my hospitalization goes, it was the best thing that could have happened to me. I rested and it was the beginning of what I do today. It opened my eyes to what a specialized population mothers with mood disorders are and strengthened my resolve not to let any mother go through the experience alone and unguided. If there is anything worse than a Postpartum Mood Disorder, it’s going through it alone, feeling misunderstood by everyone around you, wondering what on earth is going on with you and getting scared out of your mind.

You don’t recognize the person in the mirror – who is she and when will she leave? You learn to cope with her but still wish she would disappear or at least stop showing up so much. Eventually she does fade but the fading takes time when you wait for it to happen all alone in the cold. With the warmth and strength of others, you learn how to get her to fade much quicker. She stops standing in between you and your baby, stops yelling at your husband, stops soaking your cheeks or re-organizing the cabinets for the twentieth time today. There is something to that power in numbers thing. It works.

Stigma is a very powerful force in the human world. It’s peer pressure gone horribly wrong. Peer pressure that encourages you to be miserable, silent, and hang your head down low should not accompany any new mother. Instead, the peer pressure should be that it’s ok to talk about your feelings and open up, it’s ok to hold your head high and know that as long as baby is fed, diapered, and has a warm place to sleep, you’re doing the best you can with what you have at the moment. Peer pressure should be the warmth of another person who KNOWS what you’re going through because she’s been there too.

Don’t let the stigma keep you from getting help. Don’t let the fear keep you from getting help.

Getting help is the absolute best thing you can do for YOU and for your family.

A new project – just for DADS!

Ok, ok, so in the interest of full disclosure, I am co-partner in this project. Go check it out already!

ppd-dads-project-logo

New Support Site for Postpartum Dads Launches just in time for the Holidays

The Postpartum Dads Project plans to focus on collecting stories from Dads who have experienced depression themselves or have been with a partner who has experienced a Mood disorder after the birth of a child.

December 5, 2008 – With the goal of getting new Dads to open up about the havoc Postpartum Depression can wreak, the Postpartum Dads Project launches today. The project will also focus on developing a close knit community which would provide Dads a safe haven in which to connect with other fathers with similar experiences.

The project is an outcome of a partnership between Lauren Hale and David Klinker, both Coordinators with Postpartum Support International. Ms. Hale serves as the Co-Coordinator for the state of Georgia while Mr. Klinker serves as the Father’s Coordinator. In June, Ms. Hale featured interviews with Dads and their experiences with Postpartum Depression. Mr. Klinker was one of the Dads featured and this led to further discussion regarding the lack of resources available for Dads.
The Postpartum Dads Project will also be placing emphasis on Paternal Postnatal Depression. This can occur in up to 10% of all new dads. In fact, if a father’s partner is depressed, the father has a fifty percent chance of developing depression himself.

One of the primary goals of the Postpartum Dads Project will be to create a published volume that will include submissions collected through the website. These submissions will be categorized and designed to be read in between calming a fussy baby and watching the game. The development of the website will continue and many of the stories will be found there as well as insights from professionals, tips and hints from other dads who have been in the trenches, as well as the eventual addition of a Dads only forum.

A key addition to the website in the future will be a professionals only area in which professionals will have their own forum and other tools with which to discuss this relatively new area of support.
The Postpartum Project will begin by publishing interviews with Dads and professionals in the know such as Country Music Artist Wade Bowen, Michael Lurie, David Klinker, Dr. William Courtenay and has been granted permission to reprint the interview with Dr. Shoshanna Bennett’s husband, Henry. The Project will also be featured in an upcoming segment at The FatherLife.com.

For additional information on the Postpartum Dads Project, contact info@postpartumdadsproject.org or visit the website at www.postpartumdadsproject.org.

About the Postpartum Dads Project
Lauren Hale and David Klinker are both volunteers with Postpartum Support International. Lauren is very active in Postpartum Peer Support and moderates the iVillage Postpartum Depression Board, runs a local peer support group, writes Unexpected Blessing, a blog dedicated to pregnancy after PPD, and is a stay at home mom of three children. David is the Father’s Coordinator for Postpartum Support International and also runs www.postpartumdads.org. He is strongly dedicated to supporting Fathers throughout the Postpartum Period.

Contact:

info@postpartumdadsproject.org

Lauren Hale, Co-Founder

The Postpartum Dads Project
http://www.postpartumdadsproject.org
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Sharing the Journey with Ruta Nonacs, M.D.

Dr. Ruta Nonacs M.D., author of A Deeper Shade of Blue, also serves as Associate Director of the Center for Women’s Health at Massachusetts General Hospital and an Instructor in Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. She received her MD from Cornell University Medical School and her Ph.D from Rockefeller University in New York.

She is very dedicated to ensuring women, families, and professionals have accurate information regarding depression during a woman’s childbearing years. In fact, her inspiration for her book, A Deeper Shade of Blue, lies within a strong desire to provide a carefully researched resource for women and their families that lays bare the myths and facts of symptoms, treatment, and recovery. Thank you Dr. Nonacs for your pioneering efforts in this area and I look forward to your continued work!

I sincerely appreciate her willingness to share her journey here and hope you enjoy her words!

Who IS Ruta Nonacs? What do you do when you’re not teaching or doing research?

I am trained as a psychiatrist and have spent my professional life doing a combination of research and clinical practice, working mostly with women during their reproductive years. I have recently been devoting more time to Postpartum Support International; it is one of my most important professional goals to increase awareness of postpartum depression. To this end, I spend a fair amount of time writing for both medical and lay audiences. Since having kids, I started working part-time and that has worked well for me. I have two daughters, ages 3 and 8, and I feel fortunate to be able to spend a lot of time with them.

How did you come to be interested in Postpartum Mood Disorders? Was there a particular experience or situation that drew you into the topic?

During my residency, the first patient I took care of was a young woman who was in the first trimester of her pregnancy, and I had the privilege of following her for the next three years. As a single mother, it was a difficult time in her life, and I felt that I was really able to help her a great deal. I can’t help feeling that this experience had something to do with my choices later on. I also had the good fortune of doing my residency at Massachusetts General Hospital, where they have a phenomenal perinatal psychiatry program.

As we both know, motherhood is a life-changing experience. How has motherhood changed you?

It has changed me in so many ways. For one, it has permitted me to slow down and enjoy all the little small pleasures in life.

Postpartum Mood Disorder recognition and treatment options have come quite a long way, even since my first episode a little over four years ago. How much further do we have to go and in your opinion, what can we do to facilitate the furthering of positive change regarding these conditions?

Depression in all shapes and forms carries a real stigma, and I think we still have a long way to go here. I think one of the things that has helped women with postpartum depression to get treatment is hearing about other women’s experiences with the disorder.

Moms need to take time for themselves in order to recharge their batteries. What is it that you do to relax and recharge?

I wish I could say that I am good at following the advice I give to my patients. I probably don’t relax as much as I should, but I do love bicycling, being outdoors, and photography.

Of all the research you have done in the Postpartum Depression area, were there any results you were particularly surprised to obtain? If so, what were they and why were you surprised? If not, would you mind sharing a brief overview of one of your favorite research projects with us?

I think one of the things I have enjoyed about my research (and my clinical work) has been the chance to make things better. Let me clarify this a bit. We have done a great deal of research on identifying risk factors for postpartum depression. Probably the strongest risk factor is having a history of depression or anxiety before pregnancy. By identifying women at highest risk for postpartum depression, we have been able to implement certain interventions that decrease the risk of postpartum illness. That means we can actually prevent postpartum depression, and that is a truly wonderful thing.

Tell us a bit about your book, A Deeper Shade of Blue and the related blog. What inspired these projects?

A Deeper Shade of Blue is a book for the lay public that provides reliable information on the spectrum of mood and anxiety disorders that affect women during their childbearing years. In this book there is information about postpartum depression and also about mood disorders that occur during pregnancy, as well as the psychological issues surrounding infertility and pregnancy loss.

I wrote the book because there is so little accurate information out there on these topics. While there has been increasing awareness of postpartum mood disorders, most women knew very little about mood and anxiety disorders that occur during pregnancy. There is also so much misinformation in this area; for example, many women assume that they can’t take medications during pregnancy or while they are breastfeeding, and that simply isn’t true. I wanted to give women a carefully researched resource, a guide that would help them to be better informed and to get the help they need.

What is your philosophy regarding your approach to Postpartum Depression? How did you develop this philosophy?

My general philosophy is that we can never afford to ignore postpartum depression. Even when it is relatively mild, depression takes a toll on a mother and on her family. This philosophy derives from my clinical experience — seeing way to many women who have not been able to enjoy or participate in important aspects of their lives because they were depressed and did not receive any treatment.

What advice would you give to medical professionals who may come in contact with a mother who is depressed? What are some of the best things they could do for this mom? What should they not do?

I think the first thing to do is to educate the mother. Many women don’t know a lot about depression; they do not know that this is a biological illness. They don’t know what treatments are effective. Depression still carries a significant stigma, and so many women are horribly ashamed about being depressed. Medical professionals need to help to enlighten women and help them to see depression as any other type of illness that requires attention. Medical professionals need to help women access the help they need, whether it is support from the family, talk therapy, or treatment with medications. These resources are sometimes difficult to find, and we need to make sure that women get the help they need.

And last but not least, if you had a chance to give an expectant mother (new or experienced) one piece of advice, what would you tell her?

As hard as it may be, you need to take care of yourself first. If you aren’t taking care of yourself, you can’t be the mother you want to be.

Ahhh – the irony of it all

I have debated whether or not to post about this but I cannot keep it to myself any longer.

It would seem dear Amy Philo has a blog here at wordpress. Those of you who are fellow bloggers (and readers) know that at the bottom of a post WordPress now includes Possibly Related Posts. Enter irony.

Amy’s prime mission is to derail the passage of The MOTHER’S Act, legislation that if enacted, would mandate screening, education, and further research for Postpartum Depression. One of her posts regarding an article against the MOTHER’S ACT blockers has a link at the bottom. To my blog. To a Post which includes Susan Dowd Stone’s Statements regarding the MOTHER’S ACT.

Yeah.

I love the internet too.

Milking cows is cruel; Milking Humans? Not so much!

PETA, the People for Ethical Treatment of Animals has taken it a little too far. Way too far, actually.

Apparently they’ve written a letter to Ben & Jerry’s asking them to use human breast milk in their ice cream because and I quote, “cow’s milk is hazardous and that milking them is cruel.” Yet milking human women isn’t cruel?

As a mother who Exclusively Pumped for seven months, I can attest to how difficult breastmilk is to extract. Not only would it be cruel and unusual to milk women, the price of Ben & Jerry’s would sky-rocket if they were to use breastmilk.

Here’s a link to the PETA site with their side of the story.

I am disgusted with this recommended course of action, even if it is just some sort of attention grabbing ploy. How absolutely disrespecful and misunderstanding of the nursing relationship does one have to be in order to even CONSIDER suggesting such a ludicrous action? Apparently cows rank higher in importance to the folks over at PETA than Nursing Moms.