The missing wife of a Ft. Carson soldier has been found alive.
No details are forthcoming about where she was but apparently she was found with friends.
Missing Ft. Carson Wife Found Safe
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Category Archives: mom
Wife of Soldier Missing in Denver
Kristen McCartney has gone missing. According to her mother, she suffers from Postpartum Depression and was not taking her medicine at the time of her disappearance. Police have located her vehicle with keys inside but are still looking for Kristen.
Nicholas Fuelling promises to wait for his wife
Earlier this week, Kristina Fuelling found herself sentenced to the lowest possible sentence for the death of her eight day old infant. Fortunately she found herself in the presence of a very compassionate judge and prosecutor who were both able to recognize her actions were a result of Postpartum Psychosis. She is currently being held at a mental facility and will be transferred to a state prison for the remainder of her sentence once her mental state stabilizes.
Her husband, in exclusive first statements to a local news station, has promised to wait for Kristina and opened up about signs and symptoms of Postpartum Depression and Psychosis. He encourages fathers and loved ones of new mothers to educate themselves and become familiar with signs that things are not going well.
According to the article, Nicholas’ statement of encouraging awareness is:
“I would tell new mothers, or expecting mothers and fathers to research it, look into it. It’s just as important as any other factor of raising a child,” he said. “There are signs: lack of sleep, having trouble with breast feeding, having trouble taking care of the baby, lot of anxiety. But sometimes it comes just unexpectedly.Even in hindsight now, I don’t even think I could’ve been able to change it unless I knew beforehand,” Fuelling said.
“So I would tell people out there to look for signs of severe anxiety. Get help. Ask your friends and your parents, family, to come over to help take care of the kids. Don’t be alone on it if you feel any feelings of being scared or not being able to handle the situation,” he added.
Coping with Depression after PPD
Sue McRoberts, author of Lifter of My Head: How God Sustained me through Postpartum Depression, recently blogged about her recent revisit with depression. I asked Sue for permission to share her words here and she graciously granted it. So here are her words, her story about coping with depression after surviving Postpartum Depression. To keep up with how Sue is doing or to offer words of encouragement, you can visit her blog by clicking here.
I have taken quite some time to reflect on 2008 and contemplate what 2009 might hold. This past year has been a mixed bag of good and bad. I am thrilled for my husband and his wonderful new job that has brought us to Indiana. But this move has been pretty hard on me. Ten days after we left Minneapolis for Indianapolis my dear Aunt Carolyn died. I felt like I’d lost my mother and immediate support system all in one swoop that month. How do you make new friends in a new place when you are hurting twenty four hours a day? How do you even talk to someone when you have nothing but tears and grief? For six months I suffered because I had no idea what to do with all my grief. To make matters worse, once again, I felt like I’d never even existed in Minnesota. I found myself missing my friends way more than they missed me. It was deja vu and painful. I had no idea what to do with all my pain. So I spiraled downward and found myself in a familiar place. With no church home and no friends to speak of I found myself desperately depressed. I did a weird thing with God that I don’t recall doing before. I ran and hid. I didn’t want his comfort or peace. I wanted to hurt and hurt. I avoided any scriptures that would offer comfort. I read stories and parables and things Paul wrote; I avoided anything David wrote. It was completely different that when I had PPD. Each and every day I wanted to feel better, to feel human. This time around I did not want to feel better. I wanted my friends and church back. I wanted my aunt back. I reasoned that if I felt better then I didn’t really miss these people. I wondered if somehow it would mean I was okay with Carolyn being gone if I didn’t cry every single day. I cried each day for six months when I finally decided to address what was happening. I admitted publicly that I was struggling with depression…again…and it cost me some huge opportunities professionally in ministry. I was devastated as I never predicted such an outcome of my honesty. It took me six weeks of reeling in pain to reach the point where I called my doctor for help. My world felt like a bottomless, foggy pit and the medicine and medical support gave me a floor to stand on. I am now reading the Psalms again and clinging to God for strength and hope. I’ve decided to quit being a stubborn mule and ask Him for his loving comfort. For some reason I felt like I needed to prove to God that I could do this by myself, boy that was dumb. So here I am feeling pretty darn healthy. I’m running and training for my first half marathon. I’m sleeping well and I’ve stopped crying. I’m reading a book about grief that is helping me sort out my world post Carolyn. I’m determined to figure out how to live in my new world in Indiana. I will continue to encourage people to see their doctor if they are depressed for months on end. I take a pill and I’m okay with that. Not everyone in ministry is. I’m in a good place now and I’m able to pray for them, pray that they will never experience the depths of depression that I have. I pray they will never understand the pain I’ve felt. And I’m grateful to God for new opportunities that he’s already brought me. I am hopeful that I will find my place in this world and that God will grow me up some more in the process. So here’s to a new year, a new year for a better me, and for a better you.
Be lifted!
Sue
Isaiah 43:18-19
Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.
Health care practitioners discourage disclosure of Postnatal Depression
Picture by Flickr
The results are chilling.
The mothers reported making a conscious decision regarding their decision to disclose symptoms of Postpartum Depression which is not terribly shocking because I went through the same thing. It is most definitely a conscious decision and a difficult one at that.
The chilling result lies within the response of the Health Practioners “described strategies used to hinder disclosure and described a reluctance to make a diagnosis of postnatal depression, as they had few personal resources to manage women with postnatal depression themselves, and no services to which to refer women for further treatment.”
I feel as if I’ve been punched in the gut. I want to cry, scream, yell, stomp my feet. But I know that won’t change what’s going on over there and even over here because I’m sure this attitude is very pervasive in the medical community here in America as well.
Where’s the responsibility of the medical professional who turns a blind eye to the struggling new mother and actually uses strategies to prevent her from admitting she’s having a hard time? How does that serve anyone but the selfish nature of that physician? What happened to the Hippocratic Oath and “Do no Harm?”
If we pretend a problem doesn’t exist, it doesn’t go away. What if we pretended cancer was all in our heads and didn’t offer chemo, radiation, or other therapies? Would it go away or would it sit and fester, eventually killing us and hurting those around us? I think we all know that answer. It is no different with Postpartum Mood Disorders. Left untreated a new mother may even slip into Psychosis as she tries to rationalize intrusive thoughts or fall even deeper into depression and attempt to take her own life or even worse, that of her infant’s.
With all the online resources, training, and knowledge at the fingertips of even lay-people such as myself, there is no excuse for medical professionals to ignore this condition anymore. Any medical professional in my opinion who would implement strategies to hinder disclosure of symptoms should be stripped of the right to practice medicine. It’s wrong and it should NOT be acceptable. Mothers deserve to be treated honestly and with respect. They need to be given a safe place in which they are able to admit any emotional trauma or difficulty they are having. Giving them this space will foster the growth of trust and compassion rather than continue to grow the cold shoulder on which they have apparently been leaning upon.
So what can we do about this? Write about it like Katherine Stone, myself, Cheryl Jazzar, and others. SPEAK like Natalie Dombrowski, become active in online peer support like Tonya Rosenberg, talk to another mom and let her lean on you. Let her know you too have been there. Talk with doctors or their nursing staff about your experience and how important their role in discover and recovery can be. Write your Senator in support of The MOTHER’S Act as this wil laid in the growth of knowledge and support among the medical professional as well as research regarding how to bring the new mother and medical professional together. Sharing your story is the best thing a survivor can do. Our voices woven together can be the strongest advocate for increased treatment and acceptance. Won’t you lend us yours?