Tag Archives: pelvic misalignment

Postpartum Voice of the week: Sue of @SueandFadra at Lives Less Ordinary

As I was clicking through all the Postpartum blog posts from this past week, one stood out.

The sheer honesty, power, intensity, and raw emotion of the writing leapt off the screen at me. I found myself nodding my head several times, connecting with her story. It is a rare thing to find a writer who not only opens up about her experience with mental illness but does so in such a way that she captivates you, drawing you in until it is just you and her words.

You can find her story here.

Sue’s story really started to speak to me when she mentioned her issues with her pelvis. I had similar issues with all three of my pregnancies. It was never as severe as hers but lemme tell you, when your body produces entirely too much relaxin and your hips can barely keep themselves together to keep the baby in, the pain is excruciating. During my first pregnancy, I could barely put on underwear or shoes without weeping from the intense pain. Turning over in bed? Out of the question. I prayed I wouldn’t have to pee in the middle of the night. We had to get a tempurpedic mattress topper just to make it tolerable. And sleeping on my side (ie, on my HIPS/Pelvis) made things worse. My first OB, classic knowledgeable God that he was, simply told me “Welcome to pregnancy.” Sorry dude, but normal pregnancy should not have you in tears as you get dressed. I ended up on self-commanded bed rest the last two months of my first pregnancy because walking around hurt too much. I stayed propped up on the couch with a vibrating heating pad most days and watched TV. It sucked.

My second pregnancy began to head the same way at four months along. New OB this time – I got PT, which helped. Third pregnancy, symptoms showed up at three months. I got water therapy and it? Was a lifesaver. I ended up agreeing to getting induced at 38 weeks because by that time, baby was so low and weighing so heavily on my weary pelvis that I could again barely walk.

Often times, doctors here in the US are misguidedly unaware of this rare pelvic disorder and brush it off as “normal” pregnancy pain/adjustment. But it’s not. And it can disable you for life if handled incorrectly, especially if you have a vaginal delivery and are suffering from a severe case of it as Sue found herself. For most, the pelvic pain does fade after birth but many women struggle with pelvis issues for life. I could feel my pelvis shift in and out of joint after my second pregnancy, especially when driving my car. It was worse after my second delivery. I can still pop it in and out of joint. But lemme tell you, it hurts like the dickens if it’s out. Oh, the burning, the aching… it’s enough to make me want to take a tranquilizer. I am doing much better these days as I’ve been faithful with doing yoga each and every morning. But the issues caused by pregnancy and relaxin will haunt my pelvis for life, I fear. It’s a large part of why I will never get pregnant again. I don’t think my pelvis could handle another pregnancy. Physically and mentally, I am done.

Enough about me though, let’s get back to Sue. This is, after all, her award post! (I apologize for the digression, it’s just so rare to read about someone else who went through similar pelvic issues during pregnancy!)

Sue’s post is entitled “My Voice, My Depression” and with those words, she owns her Depression instead of the other way around. Sue takes back the power which Depression can hold over so many of us.

My favorite passage:

I am desperately trying to get past this time in my life, but I know it will take some time. I have acquired the amazing talent of hiding all of what I have said above from the rest of the word. If you see me on the street you would think nothing but, there goes funny, upbeat Sue. While underneath I an working, fighting and choosing a happier path than I have had the last few years.

These days are hard because I am trying my best to work though them. Emotional work is extremely difficult. It consumes you and can bring your life to a screeching halt.

Sue is in the middle of her Postpartum experience, still struggling, still fighting to escape the fog and the darkness. And yet she has written with such clarity about the journey she is currently experiencing. For that, she is The Postpartum Voice of the Week.

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The Insanity of Sickness & Christmas

Oh how it royally bites to be sick on a holiday. Especially when you’re the one cooking THE MEAL and it’s your first time at the helm for such a big event. I somehow managed to hold it all together and pulled off an awesome Christmas Lunch of (get this) Roast Beef Tenderloin with Beef Mushroom Sauce, Carrot Souffle, Green Bean Bundles, Creamed Corn, and Yorkshire Pudding. I baked a Scripture Cake the night before in honor of the man of the day, Jesus.

Yet once I stopped moving frantically about in the kitchen and sat down, my body realized the rush was over and apparently gave itself permission to implode.

My left hip? Out of alignment for the better part of the afternoon and evening. Only heat and a whopping dose of Tylenol and Ibuprofen cleared that up. And thank goodness it did because I was unable to bear weight on my left side without almost collapsing and crying outloud.

My head and chest? Obscenely Congested. Tylenol Cold did nothing for me. Ended up making a Walgreens run at 10p last night for myself and for Cameron. I got Severe Cold Meds and Nasal Spray. He got a little Flowing Vapors desk thingy by Triaminic. (Have I mentioned Charlotte’s sick too?)

All of this started last Friday when Alli was coughing slightly. The cough got worse and by Sunday evening I was at the ER with her. First thing I did when we got ushered back to a room? Turned on the NY Giants game! (Thank GOD they won!) She had to get a strep swab, flu swab (which is a nasal swab and not an easy thing to watch), take some ibuprofen and tylenol, get some chest x-rays, get said x-rays done again, and finally ended up with a diagnosis of Possible Pneumonia. She was given antibiotics there and we were sent home with a prescription. Half an hour after she took the antibiotics she threw up. Repeated this again in the morning when we tried to give Motrin. Off to the ped’s office with a feverish uncooperative toddler in tow.

Much of this past week has been spent in a headlock with Alli to get her to take her meds and trying to conserve the tissue use because her nose has been running a freakishly long marathon. We’re all coughing (except for Chris) and today has found me in bed for the better part of it – I’ve been awake a couple of times but not very long. I’m due to take some more medicine here shortly (I think – how bad is that!) and am ready to crawl back into bed and rest. I just can’t take being awake anymore. My head is pouding, my voice has apparently bought the last ticket to Clarksville, and this cough and congestion is driving me insane.

And for the record, Chris has been absolutely awesome today. He’s really taken the reigns and let me pass out. I can’t even begin to express how much that has meant to me!

So forgive me if I haven’t posted much the past week or don’t post much for the next few days. I’m taking my own advice and doing some much needed self-care.

And we have a date!

I am tentatively scheduled for induction on Dec 17th at 7pm. Provided the scan and amnio that morning show the same rate of growth and mature lung development, I’ll be going in for a Cervidil induction that evening. OB and I discussed risks of induction as well as method – and thankfully he likes to go slow with the pit if it’s needed so I’m good with that. To be completely honest, I know that natural spontaneous labor is best but with my pelvic issues, the potential large size of baby, and me just well, having those typical 3rd trimester feelings, I am OH SO READY to be done with pregnancy forever, part of the reason I am not fighting this induction as much as I have fought inductions in the past.

I have another OB appt next monday, a talk therapy appt this friday, and my last PACE meeting of the year a week from tomorrow. Everything is neatly falling into place and I honestly have to wonder if God’s hand isn’t in this somehow. I’m pretty sure I know the answer to that one and just have to Thank Him for this situation!

Hey Kid! That’s my pelvic bone you’re punching!

So STOP already!

UGH! For the better part of the evening Cameron has been kicking my ribs and punching my pelvic bone. And to think – when I was filling my dad in on the news about the upcoming induction, he commented (jokingly of course) “Not interested in prolonging the joys of pregnancy, huh?” To which I promptly replied – “Ummm, yeah, no, not really, considering this is my third in four years. I am SO done being pregnant!”

And with that, I bid you adieu for the evening. I am going to attempt to sleep so that even if I AM getting punched in the pelvic bone, I won’t feel it anymore.

34 week OB visit & Growth Check U/S

Well well well.

Today was interesting. I feel like the FF button has been pushed and I couldn’t be more thrilled! (ok, and nervous but more excited than anything)

Had an u/s check for growth today. Cameron is measuring at 37wks even though I’m only 34 wks. Estimated weight is 6lbs 12oz today. SO…. we discussed induction in a few weeks. I’ve got another appt on Monday for him to check my cervix and schedule the induction for the 18th. I also have a follow up scan + amnio scheduled for the 17th to double check the growth as well as lung maturity. I’ll be 37wks by then so I agreed to the amnio. Normally I’m very much against them but at 37wks, at least if I have to be rushed into delivery, I’ll be at what is typically considered full term so I’m not risking miscarriage. I definitely plan on doing research today into amnio – I haven’t looked completely into it prior to this because it’s never been an issue until now. (editing to add a link about the amniocentesis from the Mayo Clinic: http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/amniocentesis/PR00144) I feel a lot better about the procedure now, especially with it being at 37 weeks.

And while I am not all that thrilled about induction because I KNOW pitocin will probably have to be involved, I’d rather have an induction than a c-sec. PLUS the u/s showed the Cameron IS indeed head down, although his feet are to the left of my belly button. I bet he’s got some sort of a crick in his neck! LOL

The other positive is that my last PACE meeting of the year is Dec 11th so this will all happen after the last meeting and well before the first meeting of the year – giving me time to recover and get somewhat of a grasp on the new family dynamic prior to resuming my PACE duties. (God’s hand, you think?)

Got a lot of emailing and research to do now – and definitely need to get that postpartum action plan finished well, tomorrow!

Oh, and as a note to the pelvic pain, got a back massage from Chris last night and wouldn’t you know it – I popped back into alignment last night! WOOHOOO!

Ebb and Flow

A cold snuck up on me this past weekend. Friday morning I had the sniffles. Chalked it up to allergies. By the end of the day I had phoned my OB’s office to find out what medicines I could take. I felt myself slipping into the downward spiral of the severe blah’s. My eyes hurt, I could hardly keep my them open, my throat was scratchy and sore. And the giveaway of imminent illness – a craving for Chicken noodle soup. I HATE chicken noodle soup and absolutely do not eat the stuff unless I’m sick. I even visited Progresso’s website to make sure they had a decent version. Couldn’t tell though – they just had the names listed, not pictures. Chris picked me up a can on the way home from work. I downed the soup once he got home and went straight to bed at 830p. I should mention that I had been awake since 5a that morning with a runny nose and severe pelvic pain on top of everything else. He also brought me some medicine which I took even before I ate my soup.

I felt better Saturday morning but still had a craving for Chicken Noodle Soup. Odd for me – I never crave anything other than breakfast food in the morning. I even thought about eating the chicken and rice soup we had but I dislike that even more than chicken noodle soup. Took medicine all day Saturday and didn’t really eat much but did keep hydrated. Had a huge italian dinner though. Would have been better if I had cooked it at home but hey, when you’re sick – taste isn’t really a huge factor.

I’m much better now, off cold meds, and the sniffles are mostly gone.

Charlotte started to self-feed over the weekend. It’s been exciting and bittersweet at the same time. I’m starting to go through the emotions of what I felt when I stopped pumping for her. She’s been sitting on my lap in the living room while I feed her so it’s been our “bonding” time. She is still on my lap but as soon as I get the dining room table cleaned off, we’ll start eating at the table. I knew she’d be growing up and I know this is a good thing but it’s still hard. I am so proud of her for how far she’s come – from a cleft palate &  being on an NG tube to a g-tube and now, less than a year after having her g-tube removed, she’s thriving and feeding herself. I couldn’t really ask for a bigger miracle. As for cuddle time, she has taken to picking up books, bringing them to me, slamming them in my lap, and then waiting for me to pick her up and read the book to her. Sometimes we make it through the entire book, sometimes just the first page. Depends on how tired she is when she brings the book to me. *sighs* Motherhood – full of ebb and flow…..

On another note, I purposefully recorded two episodes of Oprah last week. Halle Berry’s interview and Sinead O’Connor’s interviews both got snatched up by the TiVo. Both women said something that really stuck with me and probably wouldn’t have hit me the way they did had I not just experienced the past year and a half I did.

Halle Berry commented on how once you’ve been down in a valley, you learn the way out and when you go there again, you’re able to find the way out faster.  A lightbulb popped on in my head when she said that. Makes SO much sense and was very comforting to hear.

Sinead O’Connor’s comment that struck me was about medications. She stated that her medication provided the scaffolding that allowed her to recover. That when she was sick, it was like a brick here or there would just go missing and crumble. She kept saying that she probably wasn’t describing her experience to the best of her ability but I thought she did a rather fantastic job at making the mental illness journey a concrete image. (She also said that after taking meds the first time, she felt “concrete” filling in the holes…. Sinead has been diagnosed as bipolar)

I’m amazed at how differently I interpret and analyze things now. I am starting to put more of a positive spin on things and when I say something positive to someone in a day-to-day situation, I am somewhat surprised at myself but joyfully so. I am loving laughing more and being sillier with my kids and husband. My mom sometimes doesn’t know what to do with me because I’m even joking with her too now. She’s so not used to that. She’s used to me being serious and sarcastic which is funny to me now because I GOT my sense of humor from HER. She’s always been the one to emphasize trying to find the funny side of a situation. If you can laugh at it, then laugh. And I do try to laugh. If I didn’t, I’d cry, I think. Never been much of a crier though. I tend to hold things in and lash out with anger and irritability. Working on that though – have a feeling that will be a constant work in progress but I’m a LOT better than I used to be – and everyone around me will tell you so.

Gotta run, I hear Alli calling me.

Kids make everything better…

Right before I could type a single word here, my three year old yelled to me from her room (it’s quiet time) that she had to go potty. And so off I went – to help her get to the potty and to supervise – you know, ensure that the toilet paper didn’t ALL come off the roll, that she went IN the potty, etc. We talked about her ladybug. I brought her one as a surprise this morning. Yes, it was live. Now – well, not so much. She’s got it on her dresser top and is keeping a close eye on it. Hasn’t moved yet, she tells me. Maybe it’s taking a nap or like something she says. I tried to explain to her that it may just be not with us anymore. But she didn’t quite want accept that explanation, hence, the watching.

What I WAS going to type here wasn’t going to be nice – I needed to vent. Badly. But now I’m all better. Amazing how a discussion about a possibly dead ladybug and a three year old’s optimism that it’s not dead suddenly makes everything else melt away.

The girls and I went outside this morning to play. No stroller ride, just play. Charlotte hadn’t been walking outside yet and she was fascinated. She and I ended up just sitting down in the grass while Alli ran around the yard. Charlotte would pick up leaves and grass – and I gave her a pine cone which she promptly tried to eat. BLECH! The girls did swing for a bit and then it was time for us to come inside and have lunch. I am so glad that the weather has finally cooled off enough for us to do things like that outside. Looking so forward to more days like today.

OH! I almost forgot to add this – Alli had to pee while we were outside. As we have a rather large front yard and judging from how she was running about, I KNEW we wouldn’t make it inside. So I stripped her down, took her sandals off, and instructed her to go squat behind a tree. She didn’t quite get “squat” but she did understand behind a tree, thank goodness. As she started to go, she exclaimed “It’s just like watering plants!” Um, yeah hon. I think that was the first time I’ve ever witnessed someone actually EXCITED about peeing in the wild outdoors.

As for my mood, I’m in a great one! In fact, chris even asked me this morning why I was so bubbly. And I told him – “I just am in a really good mood today!” He was very happy for me. I’m happy for me too.

I had my one hour Glucose test today. Got the orange drink. Finished it in less than two minutes, I think. Felt fine after the test, just like I did after charlotte’s test so I’m hoping that means no Gestational Diabetes. I’ll do the diet if I have to and I’m already pretty conscious about what I eat but I’d really rather not have to mess with all that tracking, measuring, etc.

Here’s a question for those of you who are informed (specialists) in PPD – Has anyone done a study regarding the women diagnosed with GD and the percentage of those who go on to develop PPD? I’d really like to know what the results are if it’s been done. I’ll go search pub med and ask the Coordinators too.

Speaking of studies, I DID read an abstract of a study done with women who suffered from pelvic pain & PPD – and those WITH pelvic pain were more likely to end up also diagnosed with PPD once baby was delivered. I thought that was very interesting, primarily b/c I’ve had pelvic pain with both of my previous pregnancies and also had PPD.

 Time to wrap things up, I have a TON of email to reply to and now some research to do as well!

Pelvic Pain Level: BIG FAT ZERO!

At some point last night, I had a pretty deep pop in my pelvis. And woke up this morning feeling like I could dance an irish jig. Not that I’m claiming knowledge in that department, but i could have at least done the steps if someone had shown them to me!

Still going strong and amazed. I need to go ahead and get a support belt this weekend – to help keep the success going strong. SO thrilled to be completely in alignment again, especially because it’s been a couple of months.

Dear God, make the excrutiating pain go away! (please?)

PT yesterday went pretty well. Had a new therapist, didn’t much like her at first but I got her to warm up. She had me do some new exercises and I didn’t get to rest as much in the deep end though. :-( I did fine yesterday… today has been a whole ‘nother story though.

At 420a this morning, I woke up and had to go to the bathroom. I attempted to roll over… and I winced. Loudly. It took me 10 minutes to get out of bed and one of the options I contemplated was just going right there – yes, it hurt that badly. I finally crossed my ankles, squeezed my thighs together, pulled my body pillow out, and rolled over onto my back. I managed to roll over to my right side and sit up, wincing and crying the whole way. My first step almost caused me to fall – the pain was even more intense once I tried to bear weight. I held onto the bed almost the whole way out of the room (we have a small room). Once out, it took me another five minutes to get to the bathroom. I didn’t return until about 10 minutes later – process & travel time included. Once I managed to get back into bed (which was a LOT easier than getting out, and I laid on my right side this time so I wouldn’t have to roll over to get out, just sit up), it took me nearly 30 minutes to fall asleep. I didn’t take any tylenol because in my past experience, tylenol doesn’t help.

I’ll be purchasing a wedge pillow here pretty shortly so I can sleep on my back – and I need to get a maternity support belt as well but at this point we can only afford one or the other and being that I tend to go out of alignment during sleep, it’s more important to me that I address that issue first. Chris stayed home today to help with the girls – he was getting ready to go to work when I woke up and I burst into tears when I realized he was going to work – there was just no way I was going to be able to handle the girls on my own with the amount of pain I was experiencing. We really can’t afford for him to take a day off and I certainly wouldn’t have asked unless it was absolutely necessary.

I did end up partially popping back into place – only to take a nap and completely undo the progress I had made. UGH! Alli has been adorable about the whole thing – she keeps asking if my pelvis is owwy. Makes me smile at least – even if I am gritting my teeth behind my grin.